Not New Year… New You– Just You, But Supported

” You don’t need a new version of yourself– you need a plan that fits the life you’re actually living.”

Every January, we’re told to decide what we are going to become.

New habits. New body. New mindset. A shiny, motivated version of ourselves that’s supposed to appear on 1st January, ready to go.

But what if we paused before setting goals– and asked a better question?

What do you actually want right now?

Not what should you want.

Not what Instagram suggests.

Not what worked for someone else.

Just… You.

Before Goals, There’s Intention

Goals without intention often become another stick to beat ourselves with.

The intention is quieter. It’s about direction, not pressure.

Instead of:

   • “I want to exercise five times a week”

You might start with:

   • “I want to feel more at ease in my body”

   • “I want to feel stronger”

   • “I want to trust my body again”

   • “I want movement that feels supportive, not punishing”

Research consistently shows that goals linked to personal values and meaning– rather than external pressure– are more likely to stick. When a goal feels aligned, we’re more motivated, more compassionate with ourselves, and far more likely to continue when life gets messy ( because it always does).

One Size Never Fits All

Some people thrive on structure and tick-lists. Others shut down the moment something feels rigid.

Some love a big, clear goal on the horizon. Others need tiny steps that feel achievable on a hard day.

None of these approaches are better or worse– they’re just different nervous systems, personalities, life stages, and bodies.

Micro, Mini and Main Goals– A Kinder Way Forward

Instead of one big, overwhelming goal, try thinking in layers.

   • Micro Goals – These are the smallest possible steps– the ones you can manage even on low-energy days.

Things like:

   • Standing up and stretching once

   • Taking three mindful, slow, deep breaths

   • Noticing how your body feels after sitting too long

They may look insignificant, but they can build confidence and moementum.

   • Mini Goals – These create a gentle sense of progress.

Things like:

   • Moving your body twice a week

   • Practising a short breathing exercise most days

   • Doing one thing that supports your recovery or wellbeing

Mini goals are where routine start to form– without taking over your life.

   • Main Goals – These are your longer-term intentions– the why behind everything else.

Things like:

   • Feeling stronger after treatment

   • Reducing pain or fatigue

   • Feeling more confident moving again

   • Reconnecting with your body after illness or surgery or imoproving menopause symptoms

Main goals don’t always need tight deadlines. They are allowed to evolve.

Reflection Is Part of the Process (Not a Failure)

One of the most overlooked parts of goal-setting is reflection.

Instead of asking:

   • “Why didn’t I stick to this?”

Try:

   • “What worked for me?”

   • “What felt supportive?”

   • “What felt too much?”

Studies show that acknowledging small wins– even mentally– helps reinforce habits and increases motitvation. Progress that’s noticed is progress that continues.

If something didn’t work, that’s information– not a personal flaw.

Questions You Might Like To Ask Yourself

You don’t need all the answers. Just start with curiosity.

   • What do I want more of this year?

   • What do I want less of?

   • What feels realistic for me right now?

   • When have I felt supported by movement, rest, or routine before?

   • What tends to make me give up– and how could I soften that?

   • What would “enough” look like on a difficult day?

There are no right answers. Only honest ones.

You’re Allowed to Change Your Mind

Goals aren’t contracts.

Your body, energy, health, and life may shift– especially if you are recovering from illness, surgery, navigating life changes and menopause, or a long period of stress.

Adjusting your gioals is not failure. It’s listening.

And listening is often the most powerful skill of all.

A Gentle Reminder

You don’t need a new version of yourself.

You might just need:

   • Small steps

   • Clearer intention

   • More compassion

   • And support that fits you

What Can You Realistically Afford– Financially and Emotionally

We don’t talk enough about money when we talk about wellbeing.

Cost matters. And pretending it doesen’t can quietly create guilt, stress, or a sense of failure before you’ve even started.

Before commiting to anything, it’s worth asking:

   • How much do I want to spend each week or month?

   • What feels comfortable rather than pressured?

   • If money was tight for a while, would this add stress or support?

There’s no “right” number here.

A £10 commitment you can sustain is far more powerful than a £100 one that creates anxiety.

Your wellbeing should feel supportive, not like another bill to worry about.

Research What’s Out There– Then Choose What Fits You

It’s easy to assume there’s only one way to move, exercise or look after yourself– usually the loudest or most visible option.

But there’s often far more available than we realise.

Take a little time to explore:

   • Local classes and community groups

   • Online programmes

   • 1:1 sessions

   • Short courses rather than long contracts

   • Free or low-cost resources alongside paid support

Notice the range of prices, formats, and commitments. This helps you choose consciously rather than impulsively.

You might decide to:

   • Invest in one supported session and balance it with home practice

   • Alternate between different activities across the month

   • Spend more for a short period, then scale back

   • Choose something simple and consistent over something intense and expensive

Variety isn’t a lack of commitment– it’s often what keeps people going.

Budgeting Is Part of Self-Care

Palnning what you spend on your health and wellbeing isn’t indulgent– it’s pratical.

You minght find it helpful to think interms of:

   • Weekly support– something small and regular

   • Monthly support– a class, session or programme

   • Occaisional investment– a workshop, course, or black of sessions

When you plan ahead, you are far less likely to feel conflicted or guilty later.

And if your budget changes? Your plan can change too.

That’s not failure– that’s real life.

Age, Stage, and Condition Matter (And That’s a Good Thing)

Not every activity suits everybody– and that’s especially true if you’re:

   • recovering from illness or surgery

   • living with pain, fatigue, or long-term conditions

   • navigating menopause or ageing

   • returning to movement after a long break

Rather than asking “Can I keep up?”, try asking:

   • Is this designed for someone like me?

   • Does it allow flexibility on low-energy days?

   • Is it supportive, adaptable, and respectful of my body?

Researching what’s appropriate for your age or condition is not limiting– it’s empowering.

It helps you to choose spaces where you are more likely to feel safe, seen and successful.

You’re Allowed to Change Direction

Something that fits now may not fit forever.

Your body will change – Your energy will fluctuate – Your priorities may shift

Revisting your choices– financial, physical, or emotional– is part of being connected to yourself.

Nothing here needs to be fixed or final.

Bringing It All Together

When goal-setting includes:

   • intention

   • realistic budgeting

   • research and choice

   • age- and condition– appropriate options

   • and room to adapt

It stops being about discipline– and starts being about care. You just need to find something that fits you– right now.

Download your free Gentle Approach to Goal Setting Worksheet Here